alone – A Poet's Pen

Alone

I am alone

In the streets of a foreign city

In the night when the people empty

Out of this place

I am not home

In these pieces of broken places

In my mind where I feel wasted

and lose my days

I find a bottle and let it fill me with

dread and fear

while blackened vision kills the feeling

so I can lie here

On the ground next to glass and trash

And abandoned lifeless things

I see myself in reflections of

abandoned buildings

So I die to myself

Every time I close my eyes

I try to accept

the parts of me that lie

But I won’t let go

Of the dark beneath my eyes

And I can’t say no

To the voices in my mind

I am alone

Clarity.

Time seems to hide in my moments of clarity,

Like days will melt into years

With quiet mornings and him

Holding my hand

And drinking coffee.

But it is morning,

And I am alone.

His body is molded into a plastic chair

Learning coded messages

From pieces of technology

As he sends words to me

Through small screens and dying batteries.

I am sitting on the couch

Writing and planning for next week,

Imagining little voices calling out for me

To teach words and metaphors.

I am alone,

But in my dreams I will still have time to meet

And talk and laugh and listen.

I am alone,

But I hold him here.