My Voice.

To the teachers, writers and poets who gave me a voice.

 

You gave me words to speak,

A pencil to write,

And a heart to recognize

The beats and rhythms in my mind.

You gave me a fresh breath for life,

And made me a free man.

You took me to places

With pieces and pages—

And I wanted to thank you.

Thank you for the words that changed my course,

And gave me a sense of direction again.

Thank you for teaching me lessons to give to my future children.

You gave me a reason to be,

And you gave me poetry.

365 Days

525600 minutes,

365 days,

And a year has past.

 

In my next year I will spend

180 of those days

With my students,

 

But for the past 4 years I kept track of those days in classes

Asking questions and learning about the definition

Of what it meant to be a teacher.

 

So what does it mean?

 

It means long nights and short weekends,

And finding time you don’t have for grading papers,

And buying enough pencils and erasers

To build a fort

When you know full well that you will lose all of those

Within the first semester.

 

It also means giving back to the school that gave you a voice,

And taught you more about yourself and others

Than it did about American presidents and quadratic equations.

It means shedding light on the students without a guide,

And shattering each mirror that threatens to damage a person’s self image.

It’s listening and understanding the students sitting in front of you—

The kids who are asking to be heard, and asking questions that will someday shape their world,

And yours.

This is what it means to be a teacher.

It is someone who is willing to spend every day learning,

Someone who measures worth in effort and character,

Rather than in numbers.

 

Are you Happy?

I have something to tell you,

but I’m not sure how to say it.

Are you happy?

I want you to be happy,

But I’m not sure what to do–

I feel like I’m tiptoeing around shattered glass,

Picking up stray pieces,

Wondering where they came from.

I want to tell you something,

But I feel like there are no words left for me to say–

For me to fix the broken things.

I don’t know you,

But I want to.

I want to wrap my arms around you,

But instead of touching you,

I want my words to be the arms

That bring you comfort.

Warmth.

I want to make you laugh,

And see you smile with your eyes–

Because I want you to know that I really do care,

And I am a broken person, too,

But my heart still wants the same things–

To love well, and to be loved well.

So I don’t expect much,

But I want you to know my heart is here.

It’s beating, and it may sound faint at times,

But it’s here.

I know you can’t save me,

And I can’t save you,

But all I can think to say is,

I want you to be happy.

Are you happy?

Venom

A Word to the Wise


Your words are venom–

The kind of venom that gets beneath the skin and spreads like a bug bite.

A bee sting.

The kind of feeling you get from someone repeatedly pricking every inch of your skin with a fine needle–

You’re bearable, but miserable.

Your skin is corroding beneath the negativity lining subtle words,

Bringing death closer than it was before,

And deepening the creases you thought were signs of age–

And time,

But I realized you words were laced with experience.

Times when you had to fight beneath your skin while you listened

To adults tell you how to live and how to be.

I realized you didn’t have much of a chance to be yourself,

Because you had responsibilities and weights that brought you to your knees.

Your words aren’t venom,

They are burning because you didn’t allow yourself to cry

Over the loss.

My Campus Letter

A poem I wrote during my Senior year of college.


I am going home.

I am leaving, but I hate saying good-bye.

Good-byes are hard, and they aren’t honest. You can’t look someone in the eye and tell them it’s good that you’re leaving– 

So here I am

Standing–

Looking around at empty spaces,

Thinking about the students melting away in plastic chairs,

Waiting for their day to start.

Why am I here?

Give me back my sophomore year–

When my friends sat on the quad and played guitar music,

And started paint wars, flour wars, and water balloon fights.

When my first impression consisted of the random girl sitting in a tree reading

And people called me a hippie, because I ran in my bare feet.

Give me back the late nights at Omlette Spot, and the basic days at Starbucks,

When we used to think the “Why?” questions, and found ourselves in the stars–

When we sat with our legs crossed, shuffling through a deck of cards–

Give me back my friends,

The people I shared my life with,

And the people who loved with their whole selves–

Not just with their words.

Give me back the girl I was sophomore year.

I want to feel light again, like I can fly,

And find off the wall dreams.

Give me back my piece of something…

But I am leaving.

And this short span in my existence is coming to its end–

So the bell rings.

My mind rushes forward as I see students pour out from their classes,

And relief leaves me.

I bow my head, smile at my bare feet, and close my eyes.

I guess this is good-bye.